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Coffee Break Chuckles
05-18-2011, 09:52 AM
Post: #21
RE: Coffee Break Chuckles
Hello world!

JFK'S Secretary of State, Dean Rusk, was in France in the early 60's when Charles DeGaulle decided to pull out of NATO.
DeGaulle said he wanted all US military out of France as soon as possible.
Rusk responded, �Does that include those who are buried here?"
DeGaulle did not respond.

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05-23-2011, 10:39 AM
Post: #22
RE: Coffee Break Chuckles
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A guy with a huge orange head goes in to see a doctor. The doctor says, "How did you get such a huge orange head?" The guy says, "Well, one day I was walking down the beach when I tripped over an old lantern. A genie came out and said, I'll grant you three wishes, whatever you desire...what is your first wish?' I said, I'd like all the money I could ever spend.' The genie went Poof!', and there it was, all the money I could ever spend. Then he said, What is your second wish?' I said, I'd like a beautiful woman to love me, someone I could enjoy this money with.' The genie went Poof!', and there she was, a gorgeous girl who immediately loved me. Then the genie said, And what is your third wish?'...and I think this is where I went wrong...I said, I'd like a huge orange head.'"

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05-24-2011, 10:21 AM
Post: #23
RE: Coffee Break Chuckles
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Lawyer: "When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?"
Other Lawyer: "Objection. That question should be taken out and shot." Undecided

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05-27-2011, 08:07 AM
Post: #24
RE: Coffee Break Chuckles
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The long awaited seminar on time travel will now be held at the Royal Society at 2pm last Friday.Huh

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05-27-2011, 08:27 AM
Post: #25
RE: Coffee Break Chuckles
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If at first you don't succeed you'll get a lot of advice from those who didn't succeed either.Tongue

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05-31-2011, 09:01 AM
Post: #26
RE: Coffee Break Chuckles
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◦Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in New York?"
◦Witness: "I refuse to answer that question.
◦Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in Chicago?"
◦Witness: "I refuse to answer that question.
◦Lawyer: "Did you ever stay all night with this man in Miami?"
◦Witness: "No."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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06-01-2011, 09:02 AM
Post: #27
RE: Coffee Break Chuckles
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My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.Blush

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06-01-2011, 05:37 PM
Post: #28
RE: Coffee Break Chuckles
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Lawyer: "The truth of the matter is that you were not an unbiased, objective witness, isn't it? You too were shot in the fracas."
Witness: "No, sir. I was shot midway between the fracas and the naval." Sad

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06-02-2011, 11:06 AM
Post: #29
RE: Coffee Break Chuckles
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Lawyer: "Sir, what is your IQ?"
Witness: "Well, I can see pretty well, I think." Big Grin

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06-06-2011, 09:13 AM
Post: #30
RE: Coffee Break Chuckles
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After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, Canadian scientists found
traces of copper wire dating back 200 years and came to the conclusion that
their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 150 years ago.

Not to be outdone by their neighbours, in the weeks that followed, an American
Archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet, and shortly after, a story published in the New York Times:
"American archaeologists, finding traces of 250-year-old copper wire, have concluded that their
ancestors already had an advanced high-tech communications network 50 years earlier than the Canadians".

One week later, the British authorities reported the following:
"After digging as deep as 30 feet in North Yorkshire, Jack Arkwright, a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he found absolutely f*** all.
Jack has therefore concluded that 250 years ago, Britain had already gone wireless."

Just makes you bloody proud to be British, don't it!Tongue

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